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But Dora and I had so much fun. Sometimes I thought, I can standanything if I can just see Dora within a few days.""She was verbal and imaginative, the way you were.""Absolutely, full of dreams and visions. Dora is no naif, now, youhave to understand. Dora's a theologian. That's the amazing part.
The desire for something spectacular? That I engendered in her, butthe faith in God, the faith in theology? I don't know where that camefrom."Theology. The word gave me pause.
"Meantime, Terry and I began to hate each other. When school-time came, so did the fights. The fights were hell. I wanted SacredHeart Academy for Dora, dancing lessons, music lessons, two weeksaway with me in Europe. Terry hated me. I wasn't going to make herlittle girl into a snot. Terry had already moved out of the St. CharlesAvenue house, calling it old and creepy, and settled for a shack of aranch-style tract home on some naked street in the soggy suburbs! Somy kid was already snatched from the Garden District and all thosecolors, and settled in a place where the nearest architectural curiositywas the local y-Eleven.
"I was getting desperate and Dora was getting older, old enoughperhaps to be stolen effectively from her mother, whom she did lovein a very protective and kind way. There was something silent betweenthose two, you know, talking had nothing to do with it. AndTerry was proud of Dora.""And then this boyfriend came into the picture.""Right. If I had come to town a day later, my daughter and mywife would have been gone. She was skipping out on me! To hell withmy lavish checks. She was going with this bankrupt electricianboyfriend of hers to Florida!
"Dora knew from nothing and was outside playing down theblock. They were all packed! I shot Terry and the boyfriend, right inthat stupid little tract house in Metairie where Terry had chosen tobring up my daughter rather than on St. Charles Avenue. Shot themboth. Got blood all over her polyester wall-to-wall carpet, and herFormica-top kitchen breakfast bar.""I can imagine it.""I dumped both of them in the swamps. It had been a long timesince I'd handled something like this directly, but no matter, it waseasy enough. The electrician's truck was in the garage anyway, and Ibagged them up, and I took them out that way, into the back of thetruck. I took them way out somewhere, out Jefferson Highway, Idon't even know where I dumped them. No, maybe it was out ChefMenteur. Yeah, it was Chef Menteur. Somewhere around one of theold forts on die Rigules River. They just disappeared in the muck.""I can see it. I've been dumped in the swamps myself."He was too excited to hear my mumblings. He continued.
"Then I went back for Dora, who was by then sitting on the stepswith her elbows on her knees wondering why nobody was home, andthe door was locked so she couldn't get in, and she started screaming,"Daddy! I knew you'd come. I knew you would!" the minute she sawme. I didn't risk going inside to get her clothes. I didn't want her tosee the blood. I put her with me in the boyfriend's pickup truck andout of New Orleans we drove, and we left the truck in Seattle,Washington. That was my cross-country odyssey with Dora.
"All those miles, insanity, just the two of us together talking andtalking. I think I was trying to tell Dora everything that I had learned.
Nothing evil and self-destructive, nothing that would ever bringthe darkness near her, only the good things, what I had learnedabout virtue and honesty and what corrupts people, and what wasworthwhile.
" 'You can't just simply do nothing in this life, Dora,' I kept saying,'you can't just leave this world the way you found it.' I even toldher how when I was young I was going to be a religious leader, andwhat I did now was collect beautiful things, church art from all overEurope and the Orient. I dealt in it, to keep the few pieces I wanted.
I led her to believe, of course, that is what had made me rich, and bythen, oddly enough, it was partly true.""And she knew you'd killed Terry.""No. You got the wrong idea on that one. All those images weretumbling in my mind. I felt it when you were taking my blood. Thatwasn't it. She knew I'd gotten rid of Terry, or I'd freed her fromTerry, and now she could be with Daddy forever, and fly away withDaddy when Daddy flew away. That's a different thing fromknowing Daddy murdered Terry. That she does not know. Once when shewas twelve, she called, sobbing, and said, 'Daddy, will you please tellme where Mother is, where did she and that guy go when they wentto Florida.' I played it off, that I hadn't wanted to tell her that Terrywas dead. Thank God for the phone. I do very well on the phone. Ilike it. It's like being on the radio.
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