|
"You scream in Hell as you sang in Heaven. This is my kingdom, thisis our work. Remember the Light!"I fell back on my shoulder, hurting my left arm, but refusing topull my right hand free of the veil. I saw the blue sky above in a flashand the peach blossoms blowing from the green leaves of the treeeven as the luscious fruit itself clung to the branches.
Smoke stung my eyes. A woman on her knees said to me:
"I know now that no one can forgive me but myself, but howcould I have done those things to her, and she so small, how couldI....""I thought it was the other things," whispered a young girl whohad hold of my neck, her nose touching mine as she spoke, "but youknow that kindness, that just holding his hand and he....""Forgive!" Memnoch said, and parted the way, gently pushing thesouls aside. But the crowd crushed in; pale figures raced over me as iftowards a respite I couldn't see, or some source of alarm.
"Forgive!" Memnoch whispered.
He snatched up the monk covered with blood, his brown robesshredded, his feet blistered and burnt from deliberate fire. "In yourheart, the power!" said Memnoch, "Be better than Him, better thanHim, set Him an example.""I love... even Him...." came the whisper from the soul's lips asit suddenly dissolved. "Yes, He couldn't have meant for us to sufferso... He couldn't.""Did he pass the test!" I demanded. "Did that soul pass muster inthis hellish place, what he just said? Was that enough! Ignorance ofGod, was that enough! Or is he here scrambling somewhere else inall this filth, or did the Tunnel take him up! Memnoch! Help me."Everywhere, I looked for the monk with the burnt feet. I lookedand looked.
An explosion ripped the towers of the city and they tumbled. Wasthat the tolling of a bell! The huge mosque had collapsed. A man witha gun fired on those who fled. Veiled women cried out as they fell tothe ground.
Louder and louder pealed the bell.
"Good God, Memnoch, a bell tolling, listen, more than one bell.""The bells of Hell, Lestat, and they are not tolling for anyone!
They are ringing for us, Lestat!"He clutched my collar as if he'd lift me off my feet.
"Remember, your own words, Lestat, Hell's Bells, you hear thecall of Hell's Bells!""No, let me go. I didn't know what I was saying. It was poetry. Itwas stupidity. Let me go. I can't stand it!"Around the table under the lamp a dozen people argued over themap, some embracing each other as they pointed to various areasmarked in dull colors. A head was turned. A man? A face. "You!""Let me go." I turned and was thrown against a wall ofbookshelves, spines gleaming in the light, books tumbling, striking me onthe shoulders, dear God, my limbs couldn't take any more. My fistwent through the glittering globe of the world, mounted on its fancyarc of wood. A child with bent knees sat staring up at me with emptyeye sockets.
I saw the doorway and ran.
"No, let me go. I cannot. I will not. I will not.""Will not?" Memnoch caught me by my right arm, dark scowllooming over me, the wings flexing and rising, blotting out the lightagain as they closed to enfold me as though I were his own. "Will younot help me to empty this place, to send these souls to Heaven?""I can't do it!" I cried. "I won't do it!" Suddenly my fury rose. Ifelt it obliterate all fear and trembling and doubt; I felt it rushthrough my veins like molten metal. The old anger, the resolve ofLestat. "/ will not be pan of this, not for you, not for Him, not for them,not for anyone!"I staggered backwards, glaring at him. "No, not this. Not for aGod as blind as He, and not for one who demands what you demandof me. You're mad, the two of you! I won't help you. I won't. Irefuse.""You would do this to me, you would abandon me?" he cried,stricken, dark face convulsed with pain, tears shimmering on hisshining black cheeks. "You would leave me with this, and not liftyour hands to help me after all that you have done, Cain, slayer ofBrothers, slayer of the Innocents, you cannot help me?""Stop it, stop it. I won't. I can't support this. I can't help this tohappen! I cannot create this! I cannot endure it! I cannot teach in thisschool!"My throat was hoarse and burning, and the din seemed to swallowmy words but he heard them.
"No, no, I will not, not this fabric, not these rules, not this design,never, never, never!""Coward," he roared, the almond-shaped eyes immense, the fireflickering on the hard black forehead and cheeks. "I have your soul inmy hands, I hand you your salvation at a price that those who havesuffered here for millennia would beg for!""Not me. I won't be part of this pain, no, not now, not ever... Goto Him, change the rules, make it make sense, make it better, but notthis, this is beyond human endurance, this is unfair, unfair, unfair,this is unconscionable.""This is Hell, you fool! What did you expect? That you'd servethe Lord of Hell while suffering nothing?""I won't do it to them!" I screamed. "To hell with you and withme." My teeth were clenched. I seethed and stormed with my ownconviction. "I will not participate in this with them! Don't you see? Icannot accept this! I cannot commit to it. I cannot abide it. I'mleaving you now, you gave me the choice, I'm going home! Release me!"I turned.
146/163 首页 上一页 144 145 146 147 148 149 下一页 尾页
|
